Wednesday, July 09, 2008

The terrible, no good, very bad day -- PART I

MY GOODNESS. Where to start? Today was just horrible.

I have to admit it didn't start off so bad. I was anxiously awaiting confirmation of an "anniversary luncheon" that would take place today. DH's company was "celebrating" a year of working at this job site. A WHOLE YEAR! They decided they would invite the spouses/family as well. YAY. Free lunch for me + no cooking! Couldn't ask for anything more.

I bathed EVERY SINGLE KID. In a timely fashion, might I add. Did pigtails for Emma, side-swept ponytail on Emily and even put a little clip on Evelyn. And as for me, I even put on MAKE-UP! Imagine that! It was going pretty stinking well, if I do say so myself. I even called DH to make sure what time to be there and I was there EARLY. If you know me, you know I'm late. I'm sure I'll be late to my own funeral, btw. Anyway things were going PEACHY. I enjoyed a good meal, the kids ate some food and then it all went a little bit south.

After the luncheon, DH asked me to take the van in to get a tire repaired. The left rear tire has been low for about a week now, despite our attempts to fill it up with MORE air. I humored him and took it to the same place his boss takes his vehicles. The place was full and it meant I had to wait 30+ minutes for a simple patch job. I had to unload all four kids (a sleeping baby amongst them) and deal with them in the waiting area. Thankfully I had instilled in them the fear of God threatened asked them to behave beforehand, so it wasn't too bad. But still, sitting in a car shop's waiting area was not how I wanted my afternoon to unfold.

After that I was asked to go to Home Depot to take a look at appliances for our *NEW* house. We only need a Fridge, but we're getting a washer and dryer as well. OH MY GAWD. Why do I even put myself in those predicaments?! The kids were HORRIBLE. The only quiet one was the baby, and then after a while she joined the chorus because she was sleepy and therefore cranky. I tried to get the attention of some of the sales associates but they were either busy or on their lunch break of worked in a completely different department. I even told one of the managers, "I was planning on buying some appliances, but if you don't want to help me I'll gladly go spend my money somewhere else." Of course, that was all he needed to give me his undivided attention, something I couldn't reciprocate since all FOUR kids where hollering for mine. I got SOME tidbit of useful information and was forced to leave because DH needed bank information...

He needed bank information because unbeknownst to him, we were suppose to sign all the paperwork tomorrow - i.e. CLOSE ON THE HOUSE. Yeah, he didn't know. I happen to have found out and relayed the message because I called the seller/Realtor and she was excited (as was I) about closing. I can't WAIT to get into my own house -- but anyway, there are too many things that STILL have to happen for us to sign the papers - like making a WIRE TRANSFER. A wire transfer that I cannot do, because even though I manage all the finances and have access to innumerable accounts I am NOT on DH's account. Go figure. This meant DH had to get on the phone and make a few calls and well - that in itself is comparable to Moses parting the Red Sea... seriously. Anyway, he was finally able to figure it out, and we'll be closing on FRIDAY, not Thursday.

During the time that I was relaying all the necessary information to DH (like the routing #, account #, escrow reference # and so on) the kids managed to do a few... er, what's the world I'm looking for? Mischievous acts... that's what I'm looking for. Anyway, Emma DUMPED all of the BABY POWDER on the carpets. The carpets I shampooed not a week ago. The carpets I slaved over and brushed while on my hands and knees. The carpets that left me with sore legs, arms, hands and feet. Yeah, ...those carpets. And then, my loving daughter proceeded to spill a cup of water on the already spilled powder making it a nice paste which she grounded in by stomping on it. YEP. She did this. My loving daughter. Mine. I sighed... I counted to ten, and then I did NOT spank her and moved on. The baby was STILL cranky from not being able to sleep, so I went into the bedroom, closed the door behind me and took a few minutes to calm her down, soothe her and get her to close her pretty little eyes. The kids went into the living room, after being instructed to go to their room and STAY THERE. They turned on the T.V. that was OFF for a reason and jumped around the couches like MONKEYS. After I managed to get the baby to sleep I walked into the living room. And then the next few seconds are a BLUR.

I'm not sure if Emily was startled to see me, if she was jumping on the couch or WHAT THE HELL she was doing, but one thing is clear. On her way OFF the couch, she managed to shatter the window. Break it. Crack it. Ruin it. Splinter... whatever the hell word you feel like choosing... that's what happened to the window. PEOPLE, I am not lying when I tell you that I almost had a freakin' nervous break down. I try to be as patient with my kids as I can, but I can only take so much. ANYWAY, the kid was so troubled by what she had done that she immediately burst into tears. She cried and cried and cried some more and then cried herself to sleep. (Thinking about it, it's a miracle *I* didn't cry.) I called DH to tell him about it and then called the glass repairs places in town. One lady was so kind as to offer that one of the employees come remove the pane for me and the window frame thingie free of charge (just so the kids wouldn't kill themselves on the shards of glass). Thirty-eight dollars and a half hour later the window was good as new.

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